Preparing Your Firstborn for a New Sibling – Helping older siblings adjust

09/06/25 Knowledge Base Parenting

Preparing Your Firstborn for a New Sibling – Helping older siblings adjust

Welcoming a new baby into your family is an exciting and joyful time, but it can also be a big adjustment, especially for your other children. The arrival of a new sibling brings both positive and challenging emotions, and it’s natural for older children to feel unsure, excited, or even anxious about the changes that will come. At kinderzimmer, we understand the importance of preparing your children for this big transition, so that they feel secure, involved, and loved as they adjust to their new role as an older sibling.

In this blog, we’ll share practical tips to help you support your children as they prepare for their new sibling. Drawing inspiration from Montessori, Steiner, and Froebel philosophies, we’ll focus on creating a positive, nurturing environment for your child as they embrace this new chapter in your family’s life.

1. Talk About the Baby Early and Often

One of the most important things you can do to prepare your firstborn is to involve them in the process early on. Talking about the baby well before they arrive allows your child to mentally and emotionally prepare for the changes ahead. Use simple, age-appropriate language to explain what is happening - let them know that a new sibling will be joining the family and how exciting that is.

Incorporating Montessori principles, you can help your child understand the concept of the new baby by showing them real-life examples or reading books together about becoming an older sibling. This approach helps them process their feelings and gives them the tools they need to cope with the change.

2. Encourage Involvement with the Pregnancy

As your pregnancy progresses, find ways to involve your firstborn in the preparations. Let them help set up the nursery, choose clothes for the baby, or pick out a special toy. By making your other children feel like an active participant, you’re reinforcing their importance in the family while building excitement for the new arrival.

The Steiner philosophy encourages children to connect with their environment and family in meaningful ways. Encouraging your firstborn to help with preparations can instill a sense of responsibility and help them feel more confident about the role they will play as an older sibling.

3. Acknowledge and Validate Their Feelings

It’s completely normal for your firstborn to experience a range of emotions as they prepare for the new baby. They might feel excited, but also a little apprehensive or even jealous. Acknowledge these feelings and validate their emotions. Reassure them that it’s okay to feel a mix of excitement and nervousness - it’s a big change for everyone.

Froebel’s approach emphasises the importance of emotional expression and understanding in early childhood development. Encourage your firstborn to express their feelings through words, art, or even play. Let them know that you’re there to support them every step of the way.

4. Create Special One-on-One Time

As your due date approaches, it’s easy to become focused on the baby and the changes it will bring. However, it’s essential to make time for your firstborn to feel special and loved in their own right. Schedule regular one-on-one time with them, whether it’s a special outing, a story time, or simply playing together. This time reinforces that they are still an important part of the family and gives them the opportunity to bond with you before the baby arrives.

The Montessori approach highlights the importance of one-on-one attention, as it allows the child to feel seen and valued. This will help them feel secure in the face of the changes that are coming.

5. Explain What to Expect When the Baby Arrives

Once the baby is born, it’s important to prepare your firstborn for the changes they’ll experience once the baby is home. Explain that the baby will need a lot of attention, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t important. Involve your firstborn in caring for the baby in simple ways - whether it’s helping to pick out the baby’s outfit, bringing you nappies, or singing songs to the baby. These small tasks give your firstborn a sense of responsibility and help them feel included in the family’s new dynamic.

Incorporating Steiner principles, you can allow your firstborn to observe and participate in caregiving activities, fostering a connection with the new sibling and encouraging empathy. It’s also important to emphasise that while the baby will need a lot of care, you will always be there for them too.

6. Set Realistic Expectations and Prepare for Challenges

While preparing your firstborn is important, it’s equally important to set realistic expectations for the transition. There may be moments of jealousy, frustration, or attention-seeking behavior as your child adjusts to the changes. Stay patient and understanding, knowing that these feelings are natural.

Froebel’s philosophy stresses the importance of learning through play and understanding emotions. Let your firstborn explore these feelings in healthy, constructive ways. Offer them the opportunity to play with dolls or action figures and role-play becoming a big sibling. This allows them to express their emotions and work through their feelings in a safe space.

7. Celebrate Their New Role

When the baby arrives, celebrate your firstborn’s new role as an older sibling. Offer praise and positive reinforcement for their help and acknowledge their importance in the family. Creating a special “big sibling” gift or celebrating with a family ritual helps make the experience feel positive and exciting for your child.

In line with Montessori and Froebel philosophies, giving your other children responsibility and recognition fosters a sense of pride in their new role. It also helps them feel valued as an individual within the family, strengthening the sibling bond.

Conclusion: Supporting Your Firstborn Through the Transition

Preparing your firstborn for a new sibling is a process that requires patience, understanding, and love. By involving them in the journey, acknowledging their feelings, and celebrating their new role, you can help them navigate the transition with confidence and excitement.

At kinderzimmer, we understand that sibling relationships are an important part of a child’s development. By fostering a nurturing environment where both children feel loved and supported, you’re laying the foundation for a strong sibling bond that will last a lifetime.

Remember, each child’s experience with a new sibling is unique, and it’s important to approach this transition with flexibility and compassion. With the right preparation and support, your firstborn will embrace their new role with enthusiasm and joy, creating a positive start for their growing family.

Preparing Your Firstborn for a New Sibling – Helping older siblings adjust